Emotional Bank Account

It’s that time of year when people are getting their Christmas credit card statements and sometimes they are in shock of how much the holiday season actually cost them.  What about your emotional bank account? Do you take stock of how healthy your emotional bank account is, and what it might take to get your emotional health back on track? 

When we are in a healthy place ourselves it is easier to have a conflict discussion, or deal with a set-backs.  However, when we are in a more vulnerable state these are the things that can send us over the edge emotionally. Therefore, it is important to be aware of our emotional bank accounts.  If you are feeling particularly isolated and alone it will be important to connect with someone or something that is going to fill your emotional bank account. 

Don’t be surprised that there is an interest rate that you will need to pay if you are overdrawn emotionally.  This means that one positive deposit in the emotional bank account will not cancel out one negative feeling. The Gottman research indicates that it usually takes 20 positive interactions/actions to offset one negative experience. So, it is important to take stock of your emotional bank account because when you become overdrawn, it requires a lot of work to recover.